Friday, August 29, 2008

You know where you're headed.

My sister who PROMISED to live here for a year is NOT going to make it.

She is pussy footin' it on out.

Back to the Land Of melting asphalt, Havoobs (real word- def: dust storm) birds in the winter that sport white whiskers (my attempt at describing SNoWBiRDS creatively~ I don't think it worked.) high AC bills and xerascaping.
Home to Alice Cooper, David Spade, The D-backs and The Ugh- Suns. Frank Lloyd Wright had a winter home in the Valley of the Sun. Olympic Gymnist Kerry Strug was born there, along with Stevie Nicks, Geronimo, Apache Kid and Doc Holliday. Steven Spielberg, Gary Shandling, Sandra Bernhard AND Lynda Carter (oh yah. that IS Wonder Woman) have been Arizonans.

And now, the pull of all this pomp and celebrity has grabbed hold of Kelli's big ol' ears and she's being dragged back.
So, this is how I've decided to deal with the pain of losing the
in Saying IT Simply
(Kell's the middle sister) dun dun dunnnnnnn...

I am Auctioning off her Sister spot to the highest bidder.
You need to bid with sisterly duties.

ie: color my hair, watch my kids, call me a moron if it's warranted, pick on Kourtney (she's the baby).... You get the gist? Start bidding!

And, to Kelli Marie, goodbye. Take sunscreen.
I'll never forget what you look like in a tutu.

Check ya later.

Ohhh a Giveaway

Sumtinfishy is Givin'!

If you like Scentsy, you'll love this.

A Scentsy Plug In Warmer
Aren't they cute?

Please mention that I, SimplyKris sent you.
I might get an extra entry!
And she also has a Super Scentsy Auction to benefit Nie.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

AttEntIOn EvEryOnE!!!

Better head over to

for a Super-Fantabulous list of Auctions happening today.
This is your chance to participate in a Good Cause.

Help the Nielson's Recovery Fund.
They were traumatically hurt in a plane crash on the 16th(?) of August
Parent's to 4 adorable children

There hospital bills will be astronomical.

You could make this an extra Thankful Thursday.
Saying It Simply is participating.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

What Mood Today?

Kate is not a morning chick. (she is my mini me)

She needs some time to herself as she gathers her faculties and decides what mood she'll be in for the day. (as do I)

Today, Pooh came along for the Decision.

Looks like it's going to be a quiet day. (that is a Wonderful choice)

Thank you, Pooh.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

And the winner is:

And the winner is:

jendalyn who said...
Your invitations are very inviting! Love 'em! Oh, and I also love your playlist. We could've been best friends in High School! LOLJenda

Let's get these made!


Since your blog is closed please email me at!

Really Good @ being Bad

Before reading this, please take an appraising look at my header picture and try to understand.
After stepping out of a much needed shower, Wil informed me that his
unders drawer is empty .
"Do you know where the laundry is?"
I reply, "Yes."
"Can you get me some clean underwear?" Clean being the operative word here.
I reply, "No."
The reason? I didn't want to do laundry last week. So I hid it.
  • In Katey's closet. (Nobody looks in there-ever)
  • Under my bed. (When you grow up and make the decision, as my mom must have tried to do, that nothing goes under the bed~ It is a perfect hiding spot.)
  • In the garage. (Brilliant! WHY would anyone put a basket of dirty laundry in the garage. It's too insane.)
  • In the Basement. (Oh, the DUNGEON. Boxes and bags of old clothes- what's a hamper thrown into the mix?

I know this is terrible. But SERIOUSLY- I do laundry all the time. And last week I was tired of soap, softener, bleach and fabric sheets.

Not to mention the task of putting away everything. I hate to put it away.

So I hid it. And Wil donned his tighty whiteys.

I have to go start the washing machine.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Do you REALLY know him?

DO YOU? Do you REALLY know Ty Pennington?
I need him to come to my home and help me fix, uh,
The basement is unfinished.
The backyard- a definite work in progress.
The front yard- oh, I am trying.
My bedroom-not an oasis.
My family room-
Not enough ROOM for the family.
So, if you know him, run into him, have his email, please let him know that Kris needs
an extreme home makeover.
Not because anything terribly dramatic has happened. Not due to illness. Not because we've been laid off (again. long story. I just found out I was pregnant w/ Luke and the biz closed their doors.....) Really, there isn't any reason other than I think he is fabulous to look at; I love his energy; I want to chat w/ him (I probably wouldn't be very chatty- I can get shy)
ah for the love! I want him to show up at 6am with his mega phone in hand and yell,
"Good Morning, Kristine!"
Yes. Yes it would be.
If it helps, I have many power tools on hand. I own a 12" Laser-guided, Dual Compound Sliding Miter Saw. AND I know what that means.

Really Good Cause

Stephanie Nielson is the author of NieNie Dialogues. I've been by to visit a few times and was simply captivated by her pictures and beautiful outlook on life and family.

I was so terribly saddened when I found out Stephanie and her husband Christopher were in an airplane crash Saturday, August 16th.
The Nielson's are parents to 4 children (ages 1-6) and live in Arizona. They are both hospitalized with severe burns and have months and months of recovery ahead of them. With hospital bills going into the millions.

I cried deeply as I read her sister Jane's account of the family's experience with this tragedy. And checking out NieNie's blog afterwards made me ache. I held my kids a little longer on Saturday and made eye contact with Wil whenever we spoke. You never know what will happen. And I have a renewed sense of love and appreciation for the people I am blessed to know.
There is so much happening to help the Nielson Family.
First and foremost they ask for sincere prayers. Saying It Simply will be participating in DesignMom's Auction Idea on Thursday August, 28th.We will post items on which you may bid. All money will be donated to the Nielson Family.

Can you help, too?

Read one post by NieNie and you'll feel like a friend needs you.

Really funny

Vacuum is making very weird sounds.
Wil cleans the filters, checks the tubes and empties the canister.

Attempts floor suction.

As he is leaning over the Hoover to check performance,
I sneak up behind him and begin popping balloons.

He thought it was going to blow up.
I thought, "I'm funny."

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Real Bad

Let's just pretend that you know someone who's Mom babied them. And let's say that you hear that this person has, oh, let's say, broken a toe. Imagine for a moment a man around age 36. (Important factor to grasp: you have not seen this man in over 13 years.)

Picture a mom who loved her son in a TERRIBLE way and called you a Hussy and a Slut. Not viciously, but in a conversational way. It was what she thought of all girls who liked this son and all the girls whom the son LIKED. It was just part of her make up. You get the idea ~ No love lost between you and said mom.

So, when you hear the Man/Boy of 36ish has an OUCH, you ask,
"Is he having his Mommy bring him meals while he has a BooBoo?"

To which you receive,
"She's no longer with us."

Yep. That's me.

Sorry for your loss, Duck.
Devastation would encompass me if something happened to my mom.

Very VERY Big Dead Snake

Ok. This anaconda is too big. Thank Heaven it is dead.

Clickity to see the length of this monster.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Vintage Halloween ATC Swap

Anyone feel like being creative? Wanna join a swap?

I've never done this before, but I thought I'd give it a whirl.
Here's the lowdown from Two Crafty Mules:
Halloween is such a fun time of year and I thought it would be a great time to host our first blog swap with a vintage Halloween theme. This swap is a 3 for 3 ATC (Altered Trading Card) swap. What is an ATC, you ask? An ATC is a miniature work of art (the size of a playing card) which people swap with one another. The size of the ATC is always 2 1/2" by 3 1/2". It can be decorated in any form or fashion, including painting, decoupage, collage and the like. If you have not made an ATC yet, I warn you - it's really addicting. Thankfully, they are inexpensive to make, so you can craft your heart out and not break the bank.

Click on the pic to jump to join!

To Dance.... To Dream

Bought these today:
I know Kate will dance beautifully.
She can do the Chinese splits (is that what they are called?).
She is very bendy.
She loves to show me her twirls.
She loves to explain how she can kick her leg high to her Daddy.
At her first recital, I am to bring her Chocolates and Wil will bring her Flowers.
I never took ANY dance classes. I have always wanted to glide when I walk.... I stumble and lumber. Do you think it's too late to learn?

One More Example

Found another invite I did for an Open House...

Just thought I'd share...
Don't forget to Enter my 1st GiVeaWaY!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

you're invited.... to enter MY GIVEAWAY!

it's over!
You're invited To Enter MY very 1st, not Saying It Simply, Giveaway
1 custom made SET of 12 invites!
(size: 4x6)
(this could be a baby announcement, Christmas Card... or whatever)
Simply leave a comment on this post telling me what ya think!
After the winner is picked, we'll start conversing via email... I'll have you send me a favorite photo and we'll work out the details!
And thanks to Walmart's handy 1 hour photo developing, I can send it via the internet to your local Wally World.
Want an extra entry? Post about this on your site ~ and you are in twice~
Entries will be accepted until Tuesady August 26th, 2008 ~ 10pm MST
xx, kris

i've been messing around with invites lately.... can't stand the store bought cards, and don't have the space for a mess scrapbooking invites would create. So, I've stuck to the computer and here are a few I've done:

My RayBans have Red lenses

Funny. Red is Favorite Color.
what color do your lenses make the world?

You See The World Through Red Colored Glasses
You live your life with intensity. You have strong emotions and experience everything vividly.
You judge all interactions through the lens of power. You determine who has the most power and how to improve your position.

You face challenges with courage and strength. You can will your way through any problem.
You see love as the utmost expression of your passions and desires. Your romantic life is very passionate and overwhelming.

At your worst, you are easily angered and quick to fight. You will go to war with anyone.
You are happiest when you are expending a lot of energy. And you love the feeling of danger!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Ohhh.... a GIVEAWAY!!!

Nope. Not from me.
You need to check out Tanja for the goods.

It's all about ORGANIZATION!
(couldn't we all use a LITTLE help in that area?)

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Look but don't touch. (Or talk)

Will you just say "Hi"?
If I throw in a Giveaway here, will I get more comments?
How come I get the LOOKIES but NO TOUCHIES or TALKIES?
If I tell dirty details about laundry, cleaning the thrones, sweeping the garage or what's hiding in my closet.... Will I make new friends?
Maybe I'll start making up outrageous stories sprinkled with a little truth to entice new fans... like the time I was made to dress up in drag because oh, I guess I didn't look feminine enough for the SPECIAL celebration. Even though I AM a girl! (Ohhhh... want more?)
How about the time a barked at a woman (still questioning if IT actually did fall into the category of WOMAN) while shopping at the mall during the Christmas shopping frenzy? Do you want to taste the juicy details of the fight which followed my momentary lapse into my canine persona? This happened AFTER I was married...
Have you ever accused someone of being lazy and sitting down during business hours at their place of employment ~ RIGHT before you realize they are in a wheelchair. Yep. Been there. Done that.
Anyone want to chit chat? Let's be friends. I'll tell you more tidbits and you can figure out whether they fall under my actual Reality or the Realistic Realm in the corners of my mind.
xxoo to you,
my Old and New friends,

Case Closed

We have regrowth
No kiss from Kris and
Wil's now restoring our happy home
by bringing back the Goat.
Thank you. Case Closed.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Mindi's a Givin'

If you likey the bag
then Lickity Clickity the Picity
and head over to
Word to Your Mother
to enter.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Goats are Good part Deux

For those of you who have not caught on yet, my hubby Wil, has removed the facial scruff from his mug, and I feel like I should be able to state my case as to why "Goats are Good" This is my 2nd exhibit in
the fight for facial.
Actors find that the goatee gives them a brooding quality. It helps them state, "Don't bother me with your preconceived notion of beauty. I'm brooding."

Pirates don the goatee while sailing the sea. They want everyone to know, "I am just about to go on vacay and don't bother with the trivialities of grooming."

Adventurers sport the goatee for that "I just jumped off a bridge, where I crashed my airplane while seeking a lost tribe of sexy wild women who were protecting a unknown amount of riches"

Super Heroes have goatees on their days off to let everyone know, " I just need a moment to myself."
Now Wil, don't you want to be mistakenly labeled a Celeb, Pirate, Adventurer or Super Hero? That wouldn't be so bad, would it?


Just under 2 days, almost no sleep but I finished Breaking Dawn. Can't it keep going? I want more. I have a thirst (nice choice, huh?) that can't be quenched.

Read all of the Anne Rice books way back when. Loved Lestat. But the Twillight series, totally captured something in my blood which pulsed with every word.
Keep trying to get Wil to read the series. He won't cave. Has your significant other succumbed to their curious nature? Have they began turning the pages of the books with the black book jackets? Have they finally realized exactly what took their spouse from them?
"Not tonight, Honey. Bella and Edward are here."

Happy 100th Post to my Peeps

Kourtney has hit her 100th post
with humility and grace. A simple statement that she made it.
Celebrated by watching the Olympics.

Amy celebrated her 100th post with a luncheon and glitter cups. (to which little ol' me was invited.) Delish lunch, fancy refillables and getting to see some blogging celebs in the process-over the tipsy top chicks delighted us with homemade, fabulously, fancy cupcakes. If you have the chance to celebrate shared online journaling, I highly recommend it. Thanks, Amy for thinking I'm funny. And to all who were present, it was wonderful meeting you!!!

(borrowed the pics from Holly)

Sorry for your absence, Mindi. Wish you could have been there. I could have shared my dreams about you.

Where do I begin

Did a little babysitting on Thursday and believe I caught the sickies from one of my extra responsibilities.
I have been through cases of these

since last Thursday.

Spent the day in bed on Saturday and watched show after show on HGTV.

Have you noticed how tricky they are? As soon as Design on a Dime completes, they jump right into Design to Sell. No commercial break. I am sucked in before I can get up to pee. However, I did learn how to turn a bookshelf into a cushioned seat and toy box all in one blow and that i shouldn't be afraid to use a little color. I also discovered if only I would give a little more to the world, Vern Yip would come give me a little Deserving Design.

Had some of the extended fam over for din din last night. Baja Chipotle Chicken Tacos, Corn Salsa, Salad and completed the feast with Oatmeal Carmelitas. Positively Delish. After the feast, Kell, Kourt, LaDawna (Kell's Friend) and I played a rousing game of Rummy

infused with Kelli's crazy rules. We call this version KRUMMY. New rules as we deal each hand and they always benefit the rule maker.

Well, I feel the fever which burns down deep rising to the surface and my pillow is calling. I hope no one else gets sick. Ugh.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Goat's Are Good


If Brad can do it, so can you.
This is exhibit #1 in Kris' fight to prove that
Goat's Are Good.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Really Monday

We are targeted. Jack's scooter was also lifted.
Joel and I spent Saturday cleaning the garage.
Didn't think it was necessary to lock up goods in the garage,
but looks like I'll start doing just that.

Trying to refinance... housing prices are dropping and looks like we won't be able to save as much as we had hoped. (And I SO wanted to pick up a new car for Wil.)

So.... Saturday, Wil sprouts a wild hair and shaves off his goatee. Um.... not so happy about this, but it is his face and he's been sporting the facial since our engagement in 1993.
I was quite fond of the 'goat'.... made him look a little dangerous. Now, he looks younger than me. While he was taking the blade to his mug, I had tissue time with Katey. My oh-so-insightful 3 year old plainly stated to me, "It's just hair, Mom. It will grow back." Kids say the darnedest things.

Did you catch up there in the first paragraph that we CLEANED the garage? Yep. Our car has it's home back. Just a bit of strain, a mind of determination and sweat~lots and lots of sweat. I can now pretend to NOT be home.